Help, I think I’m a Narcissist

Introduction

It seems like everywhere I look there’s a video or article with titles such as “how to tell if you’re a narcissist” or “is your significant other a narcissist.” This got me thinking about narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), and why everyone thinks they or someone they know has this disorder. 

Brief Review of NPD Criteria from DSM-5 (5 out of 9 required) 

-Grandiose sense of self-importance 

-Preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited power, success, beauty etc. 

-Believes they are special and unique 

-Requires excessive admiration 

-Has a sense of entitlement (unreasonable expectations) 

– Interpersonally exploitative 

-Lacks empathy 

-Often envious of others or believes others are envious of them 

-Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors and attitudes 

Distinction Between a Disorder, and being a Jerk 

There is an important distinction between having NPD and having narcissistic traits. In diagnosing NPD there is a long list in DSM-5 of which the person must have 5 out 9 criteria to qualify for the diagnosis. These criteria will be present in all circumstances and relationships. Most importantly it must cause impairment in function and a subjective sense of distress. If the person meets these criteria, and it’s working for them in their life, they would not be diagnosed with NPD. You need to have the functional impairment, that is what makes it a disorder. Although these people may not have a disorder, it still does not make them a pleasure to be around. There can still be relationship difficulties both professionally and on a personal level.

Common Types of Narcissism 

The classic grandiose narcissist, this is the kind of person who cannot stop bragging about what they have, and what they have done. They tend to enjoy showing off symbols of status such as new cars or even attractive partners. They do things based on what will get them the most admiration and recognition from others rather than personal values. These types are encountered on a regular basis, you may know people like this in your personal life. 

There is a classic example of the highly successful professional who will stop at nothing to achieve their goals even if it’s at the expense of others. So naturally one place you may encounter these individuals is in the workplace. These types will exploit other people, cheat, work the system, whatever they can do to get ahead. They are usually successful and superficially charming. This pattern is less commonly encountered in daily life.

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